As my first official post to this blog I thought I would put a quote in there that can start off this chapter of my life. I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be an adult…who am I and what the hell am I doing with my life. In the past two months I have had a lot of time to contemplate who I am and who I want to be. This has been hard as the who I want to be contradicts the societal ideal of who we should be as we move further into adulthood and bind ourselves to other people, places and work.
I am 35 and have been plagued by the idea that I should have it all together at this point in my life. I don’t have a car, a home that is mine, a partner, or even a career. In July my life took a dramatic turn as I lost my job of 7 years just two days after my birthday. I still have hope that something will come up but decided against all my better judgment that I should take a break from advocacy and the non-profit world to bartend.
I think about this quote and others that have helped me come to terms with my new life…without much responsibility. My priorities have shifted and I have started to re-evaluate what I want to really do with my life. I love to help others, always have and probably always will. I also love to travel, cook, read, write and in general, be part of a community. So I am finding my way…slowly but ultimately be true to who I am and not what society wants of me. I am authentic and unapologetic that I am living my life for me and no one else. If I want to fly off and go somewhere on a whim…all I really need is money and a place to go. I like this idea that anything is possible. It takes hard work and back to back shifts sometimes…but hey that is life right. Someday I may work 9-5 but for now I will work hard, enjoy coffee, the rain, romance, life and more importantly begin to live the life I dreamed of…traveling. Stay tuned for adventures…till then…random thoughts and posts.